I always knew I wanted to be a father. I knew it would not be an easy task, but the truth is that fatherhood has been a more challenging journey than I expected. From the beginning, I decided to embrace my role as a father by challenging traditional gender stereotypes of the authoritarian, tough, or distant dad. Instead, I strive to be actively involved in raising my young son Marcelo in an equal way, both in providing support and in caring for him.
The challenges began from day one and have been, and continue to be, highly significant for my mental health. Being by Marcelo’s side every day fills me with great fulfillment and brings me countless moments of joy. At the same time, it pushes me to become a better version of myself, as I find myself needing to cultivate patience, manage stress, and cope with physical and emotional exhaustion. It has not been easy.
One of my greatest challenges is dealing with the mental exhaustion that comes from my desire to have everything under control. However, children can be very unpredictable, and fatherhood does not come with a manual, so we have to improvise every day: during play, in caregiving, and in the process of teaching them good habits. Everyday life can become exhausting.
Even so, I am very happy to have developed such a deep connection with my little Marcelo, who once told me that I am his best friend. Every afternoon when I arrive home, he is overwhelmed with excitement and welcomes me with celebration and genuine enthusiasm.
Sometimes I feel that I am doing things right as a father, and the next day I may see myself as the worst father in the world because I lost my patience and ended up yelling.
Through the ups and downs of fatherhood, you learn that it is valid to complain, feel frustrated, or show vulnerability. I believe it is not about being a perfect father, but about being a present one.
On this Father’s Day, I invite you to reflect on how involved we are in raising our children and how we manage the mental health challenges that come with it.
#EveryoneForMentalHealth
By Pedro Melgar
